A very stressful week practicing law coming to a close; thank G-d for Shabbos.
The stress of this week has caused me to reflect on just how difficult it is to keep life (and death) in perspective.
When my mother’s life was coming to an end and during shiva I had such clarity as to what was and what was not really important. During those moments it was not simply obvious to me that I “had” to put my business life “on hold”. Rather, it was clear to me that when my focus was on the true meaning and scheme of life, my law practice and all that comes with it was just not as important as it otherwise seems to be. Of course, intellectually, I have always understood that lawyering is temporal, a means to a financial end. But what happened in May was that this intellectual “fact” became an emotional reality. I had clarity of focus. I knew and felt what was and what was not really important and had no trouble following through with my actions.
This week internalizing emotionally this intellectual fact to the point where I do not feel the stress “of this world” has been a challenge. And the thought came to me that perhaps if only I kept uppermost in my mind just why it is I am saying kaddish – to elevate my mother’s soul in the olam haemes (the true world)- then maybe I could get back to where I was a few short weeks ago.
Thank G-d for Shabbos.